Fuqua Solatzo Fantasy Geek Player
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Fuqua’s has become quite the force in the Fantasy Geek game.  He fashions himself the funnyman (claims his schitck is patterned after Louie Anderson) but the jokes never quite hit.  Don’t tell him that, every joke is followed by a high-pitched revolving squeal resembling a cat’s meow run through a Doppler effect.  If you don’t what a Doppler effect is, well then maybe you’re not geeky enough for this guy.  Fuqua has buckets (literally…not figuratively) of gag items from the common whoopee cushions to the fake dog crap but Fuqua will tell you that’s just for amateurs.  He’s got jerry-rigged bottle rockets and mechanical, voice-triggered jack-in-the-boxes that spring up at guests.  Don’t you even get him started on the mysterious world of magic.  He’ll dazzle you with a fully professional magic show.  You’ll have to wait 5 minutes though…he needs to put on the black tuxedo and top hat.  Sorry…black tux t-shirt.  Our bad…and his.

Fuqua Solatzo’s background

It was tough being Fuqua in Dallas Texas.  While everyone was trying out for football, we was busy running Star Wars tribute parties in full costume.  That’s bad enough but did he really have to be Jar Jar Binks?  Did he have to wear it to school that day?  YES he did.  Fuqua was rocking tofu and real yogurt while the good ol boys hit the Dairy Queen for Belt Busters and chili fries.  Somehow, he managed in Texas against all odds and you gotta respect that he never went geek soft.  He always stayed true to his odd humor, off-kilter ways right down to the deck of cards that you’re going to have to pick a card from.  The only thing that distracts his attention from the mystical world of magic is…model trains.  We’re not talking Thomas the Train or it’s slightly older brother, Lionel.  We’re talking self-designed and built train system designed to mirror various settings, planets, and moons of the Star Wars saga. 

Geek Player Attributes and Scores

Fuqua is as tough as his magic tricks are to follow as a fantasy geek player.  His scores are high across the board.  His model train scene of endor scores 7 on the Gaming category which is his lowest score.  The fast growing back patch however, earns him a 10 in the Physique, Baby! Category.  You also can’t help but give him a 10 in the Dress Code category for self-perfuming shorts.  In the Techmology category, he offers a worthy 8 for the custom built vocoder with cylon effect.  In the Hobbies category, a signed (and sealed) David Hasselhoff poster rounds off his collection.  Of course, there’s the professional magic show set which earns a 9 in the Odditorium category to finish off an impressive fantasy geek scoring. 

Strengths and Weaknesses

Fuqua is definitely in the top 5 of fantasy geek players in terms of his category scores and he’s also real handy with white gloves and a top hat.  That’s something, right?   The Gaming category at a score of 7 is his only weakness and even that score isn’t bad.  He’s a good addition to any geek game player mix for the other categories.  He’ll also make your ham sandwich just…disappear. 


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